Of all times the word networking really hits one’s ear, it is when it is used in conjunction with looking for a job. The word alone tends to evoke an emotional response. Those energized by the idea might enjoy talking with people, but they aren’t necessarily effective networkers. Conversely, those intimidated by the very notion of reaching out can be very successful at it. Instead of approaching networking by taking a deep breath, extending yourself and hoping for the best, make sure you first understand how to implement the process. Paul Bernard offers his thoughts on that very topic in his article, “6 Tips For Networking Success.”

The real first step in networking is to make sure you understand what it really is. A tip published by the Strategic Business Network probably ties the process and the goal together best: “Networking is a vital part of everyday life. It’s about building the right set of relationships so that you’re an insider, not an outsider.” So, networking is way beyond socializing with the hopes of stumbling upon something useful or somebody interesting. Rather, it is very purposeful where every effort to connect has a clear goal.

Think about it. You already network in almost every other area of your life: connecting with peers and teachers to navigate school; obtaining referrals for services from friends; exchanging information about great sales or other consumer opportunities with family, or offering a hand to a friend of a friend after hearing of a circumstance where you could positively contribute. In all of these (networking) cases, there is a need, or want, and a specifically desired outcome.

Understanding how many ways, and for how many different reasons, you already network should demystify the process and remind you there is a measurable goal at the end. Especially when used in a career setting, the intentionality of networking is very important. Bernard offers some guidelines to give your efforts some structure and to bolster your professionalism:

Have a plan. Know with certainty why it is you are networking and exactly what you want from it. As well, be able to clearly articulate to those with whom you network what it is you need, want or can offer. Bernard strongly advises against communicating that you are “open to opportunities” and advocates for specificity in your plan.

Networking is a reciprocal relationship; it’s not just about what you need. Understand not only what you want from your contacts but also what you can bring to the table. If you have a particular contact, skill set or experience that will help someone else, be generous in your willingness to offer it whether you have received what you are seeking or not.

Perform administrative due diligence. Make sure you know whom you’ve contacted including professional titles and correct contact information. Keep very detailed notes about what was discussed especially if promises of information or follow-up were made. Bernard suggests this record keeping be kept in electronic form implying random sticky notes are not going to do the trick.

Know what to not share. Unless it is agreed that you can, do not distribute, in any way, someone else’s private contact information.

Networking is not about numbers. Don’t be what Bernard calls a “social networking junkie.” He writes, “… a social networking presence is only worth the face-to-face interactions it creates.” Build your relationship in steps: Use social media to find whom you want to pursue for a relationship; send a message to that person asking for a meeting, and, finally, set up a face-to-face (or, at least telephone) interaction.

Respect your contacts’ time. As much as it may seem some of your connections have just the right “in” to where you want to work or with whom you want to contact, it is not their responsibility to take you on as something of a client. Professionally and politely, communicate what you are wanting from them as well as what you can offer. You can follow up if you are waiting on promised information; Bernard suggests doing so every two weeks, but certainly not every day. When not in need of immediate information, check in now and then especially if your situation or needs change. But, don’t become a nuisance.

Networking is a skill to learn no matter your initial comfort level with the endeavor. It’s also a very effective tool when you learn to use it well. Understand your goal, and make sure all of your networking efforts directly support it.

Bernard, Paul. “6 Tips For Networking Success.” The Huffington Post. TheHuffingtonPost.com, Inc. 2016. Web. (10 Feb. 2016)

“Tip: Networking 4 Life.” Strategic Business Network LLC. Strategic Business Network. 2011. Web. (10 Feb. 2016)

Nancy Stoker is a Senior Client Services Representative and Research Associate with ExecSearches.com. ExecSearches provides various recruitment and executive search services for nonprofits including its nonprofit job board.